Is life coaching right for me?

 

Maybe you've been asking yourself this question lately, because you're considering hiring a coach to achieve some new and exciting goals or overcome some difficulties you're facing, or you've been simply thinking " Why do I need a coach?", than this article is right for you!

Before deciding to become a life coach myself, I experienced the help of a coach and it was hands down one of the best decisions I've ever taken. I was in a moment of transition and confusion about what I wanted to create in my life, and even If I considered myself to be "the kind of person" that can figure it out all by herself ( ask my family members how stubburn I am !) I wasn't getting anywhere with my own reflections and solutions.

It was only when I decided to open up and exchange my thoughts with a coach, that things actually started to shift forward.

What makes coaching so effective and different from other forms of support?

 

Today I'm sharing with you the 6 Biggest reasons why coaching works in my opinion :

 

IT'S NOT ABOUT THE PAST

First of all life coaching is not about digging in the past and focusing on the origins of a problem.

To give you an example, It's not about talking over and over about your childhood and traumas and the reasons that caused them. The idea instead is that by focusing on the present of a person's life during the sessions, the past is inevitably showing up in your current reality everyday, blocking you from achieving goals and influencing you in a subconscious way.

So it doesn't mean that we will never be talking about a past event of course, but just that the past event is shaping your present continuously anyways. 

More specifically life coaching is oriented to a future goal, which gives you a positive mindset to start with because you're already envisioning the change you want to achieve in the near future. 

Other kind of therapies focus mainly on the past of a person and they move you from "dysfunctional to functional" and they are adapted to conditions that prevent the client from living a "functional" , normal life. While coaching moves you from "functional to optimal" which means that clients are living already a regular life but not the best life they could live at the highest of their potential .

 

IT'S NON JUDGEMENTAL

Coaching is all about holding a safe space for the client to express himself and find his own solutions.

It's really about listening actively to the person, being completely present and not distracted by what's going on around us and be non-judgemental toward the actions and thoughts of the client.

That's the big difference between talking to a friend or family member about your problems vs working with a coach !

Think about it, how many times you tried to talk with your brother because you wanted to be listened by someone, but you felt that he was holding his own agenda about what was best for you. And maybe looking at his phone in the meanwhile 😉

Or maybe you were chatting to a friend about a very personal issue and getting as an answer something all about them and nothing about you!

Unfortunately the people we love are not always the right ones to go to in certain situations. 

So coaching is like having your own personal "cheerleader" that it's there to really listen to what you're saying without making the conversation about them or telling you what you should do. A very rare and precious thing to find nowadays right?

 

IT'S NOT ABOUT "TELLING YOU WHAT TO DO"

So this is a big one in coaching. It happened to me more than once to work with some clients and be asked "What would you do in that situation?" or " Tell me what to do". And I'm sorry to disappoint you, the coach is not there for that!

The reason is that coaching is not about telling people what to do, it's about guiding them to uncover their inner answers, often hidden under layers of beliefs and limitations. 

By the way I love the topic of intuition and owning your own answers and I talk about it in depth in my video series here. 

A coach will never tell you what to do ( or at least that's the kind of coaching that I believe in ) because the answers already lie inside of you! 

It's about empowering the person to learn how to listen to their own intuition and get to know what they really want to do through empowering questions and conversations , and never about pushing people to do what we feel it's right for them. 

 

THE COACH IS NOT AN "AUTHORITY" FOR THE CLIENT

This one follows the previous point. A coach is not an authority that you must listen to . Coaching is a partnership between the coach and the client , and this makes the whole difference !

As I mentioned before I consider myself the greatest "cheerleader" for my client, not the expert or authority he should look up to, in order to fix his life.

 

WE ALL HAVE "BLIND SPOTS"

You may be thinking that you can very well manage your life and reach your goals as you have always done by yourself.

But what about that special thing you want to manifest in your life , and it's been ages and nothing changes? And you feel like you're turning in circles. That's because you are probably repeating a pattern in your ife and the same lesson shows up again and again and you cannot understand why or how to change it.

That's because we all have blind spots! These are sides of us that we cannot detect ourselves and that's when we need someone that can act as a mirror and show them to us. 

 

YOU DON'T HAVE TO DO IT ALL ALONE

Having support is beautiful. We are social beings, and regarless or whether you are an introvert or extrovert, no man is an island and it's always nicer to ask for help and be supported in life. 

We often think, that we have to do it all, to be a wonder woman/man.

But the reality is that we don't. We don't have to fix all by ourselves and know all the answers, because "that's what cool people do".

If you think about it a general perspective the more people are successful , the greater is the support they have around. And many politicians, celebrities, sport champions ......have personal coaches to manage their successful lives. Think about a celebrity you love and admire so much, like they are beings with special powers. 

Well, They probably are not "special" , they are just like you and me but at same point they asked for help to grow in their lives in ways they couldn't have done by themselves.

So I end this blog here even If I could talk about this topic for ages! To know more about my coaching program and to book a Complementary Session with me, check out this page and I'm looking forward to hear from you and your beautiful dreams very soon. 

With love and light,

Alessia