How to break out of your comfort zone - Part 2

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How to break out of your comfort zone

In this blog series I will go through some of the experiments and experiences I went through ( and still going through daily ) on how to break out of your comfort zone and what my life in the last couple of years taught me about it.
I hope this will help you on your own path !

 

Hello there! First of all I wanted to say a BIG thank you to all the people reading and commenting my post last week ( here it's the link if you missed it ) ! I it literally made my heart sing to see so many people connecting with what I experienced and sharing their insights and what they personally went through, that's amazing and it's exactly why I decided to start this blog at the first place few months ago .

In the last week post I shared that to break out of your comfort zone in my opinion you have to start from small, daily steps. 

"How we spend our days is how we spend our lives "

I really like this quote because it reminds us that often we're waiting for one big episode to happen that will change all our life. We imagine how that ONE BIG thing will turn around the way we live daily, the way we show up in our life and we connect to others.

So we project all our attention to that future episode, and in the meanwhile we keep on living life in the same old way.

The hard truth is that even when that event finally happens, the rest of our life doesn't go back into place like in a magic fairytale, and we find ourselves craving something else, what I like to call the "What's next ? " syndrome.

But if we start making changes from our daily life, even when they may seem so tiny and futile, over time we're actually unlearning that old patterns that are holding us back and keeping us stuck in the box. And we shift the way we show up in life.

And that, my darling, it's a huge improvement !

I give you a personal example. As I mentioned in my last post, I travelled quite a lot in the last few years, and I moved living in different cities and countries.

The first time I moved out of my house I was about 17 and I spent one year studying abroad in the UK as an exchange program. As soon as I got in foreign land I felt completely free, free to be totally myself, the best version of me.

And you know what? It worked! I was free from the limitations and the patterns I had built by living home with my family. i felt like I could start fresh , without any conditioning. And it was freaking amazing ! I had lots of fun, I felt confident like never before and I changed my perspective on life and had a whole new vision of how I wanted my life to look like from that moment on.

But, and that's a big but, the truth is that as soon as I got back home, I didn't feel like anymore like this new confident girl, I actually went straight back to my old patterns and conditioning. The environment around me had not changed in the meanwhile and the insecurities and the way I used to see myself came back.

The truth is that the new environment had helped me see a better version of myself, but I kept carrying on my shoulders my old emotional baggage, a pretty heavy one, that was showing up in the little daily situations and that I couldn't solve just changing my geographical location.

I give you an example of a daily struggle, something that has always been pretty of my comfort zone and that I've been facing in the last few years :

I wasn't the kind of kid sharing lots of my emotions, and I have to admit I still struggle with it sometimes. This meant that very often when something was going through inside of me I wouldn't share it with anyone, because I thought that it was something silly or too immature to share out loud. So I kept it inside of me until the day in which multiple emotions cumulated and I exploded all my resentment and anger out.

As an introvert, sharing my emotions and struggles it's still very difficult, definitely out of my comfort zone , but it's so liberating to get them out of my body and it's incredibly healing to be listened by someone and connect on a much deeper level.

That's probably why I find verbal communication so important and so powerful. And that's one of the reasons I became passionate about coaching people and listening to them opening up and sharing their emotions with someone.

So....how do you concretely do it? What's the first step?

STEP 1 : 

Awareness is the first and super important step. During this week I want you to identify one daily pattern that you keep on repeating over and over again. It's something that has become part of your daily life and it's holding you back everyday.

  • You think about it on a regular, maybe daily basis. It come up to your mind in a subtle way, and you're so used to it that you can hardly recognize it
  • It can look something like : speaking up for yourself at work after years of waiting for that promotion, taking always the same street to go to school because of fear of exploring somewhere new, or maybe avoiding someone in your life because you know that he triggers some emotion and behavior in you . Or starting that new passion, writing your first blog post, speaking in public, wearing more colorful clothes  .....

Let's identify one little situation that feels so comfortable as it is, but that you know it's preventing you to grow and be the best version of yourself. 

I'm looking forward to hear more about it, please share what comes up for you in the comments below and let's open a conversation about it.

With love and light,

Alessia xx